Hypnosis, especially erotic hypnosis, isn’t about mind control. It’s about lowering your inhibitions and exploring desires that you might not be able to express under normal consciousness.
Erotic hypnosis can include commands like “hands-free orgasms on command” or can involve more fantastical elements like being a fembot from another planet. But it all has to be safe and consensual.
Getting Started
There are plenty of ways to explore erotic hypnosis, from learning how to hypnotize yourself to teaching a dominant partner how to hypnotize you. Clinical hypnosis courses, online resources and YouTube videos can all help. BDSM communities are also a great resource.
Ultimately, erotic hypnosis is all about the experience for both partners. And that means it’s important to be clear about the boundaries and expectations before starting. “I would recommend a couple or individual talk through their goals and needs and how they want to use hypnosis in their relationship,” says Riley. “They should know each other’s triggers, what their safety words are and what each one wants to achieve through hypnosis.”
It’s important for those interested in exploring erotic hypnosis to try non-erotic hypnosis first. It’s a good way to see how easily they enter a trance and how hypnosis affects them. You can also try out hypnosis in a safe and controlled setting like at home with friends or family members.
“The most important thing is to remember that hypnosis is not the same as sleep and that you can only do what you allow yourself to do,” explains hypnotherapist Syren Rayna. Hypnosis can free you up from your inhibitions but doesn’t make you lose your morals or who you are as a person.
Setting Boundaries
Regardless of how you feel about erotic hypnosis, it’s important to make sure you go into it with a clear set of boundaries in place. “Hypnosis helps you to drop your inhibitions, but not your morals,” NLP-certified hypnotist Syren Rayna tells mbg. “If you were a vegan and your hypnotist told you to run over a rabbit, you’d snap awake.”
Ava*, who uses she/they pronouns and is nonbinary, began listening to the Bambi Sleep files in the hopes it would help them overcome their dysphoria about their bodies. She had no idea what to expect — they’re supposed to be intense feminisation and bimbofication hypnosis recordings designed to turn the listener into a ‘bambi girl’ — but was surprised by how easy it was to fall under James’ spell.
While she found the experience pleasurable, she was incredibly uncomfortable when the session turned into what feels like a power-play scenario, where she felt reliant on James’ mental control for her safety and pleasure. This is one of the main reasons Marsh stresses researching hypnotists and learning what they’re asking their clients to do before booking a session. This includes learning how to phrase their suggestions, as well as the lingo and terminology they use.
Hypnosis is a kink that can be used in many ways, from improving sexual health to creating a more consensual power exchange in a BDSM relationship. It’s important to find a hypnotist you trust and who understands your psyche.
Talking Through Triggers
While some might see erotic hypnosis as something straight out of a thriller movie, it can actually be extremely useful. For example, if you have sexual trauma, a hypnotist can help you go back to the moment before it happened while providing a physical sense of comfort and security. The trance will then help you work through it so that you can overcome it and move on.
It can also be used to enhance lots of different kinks. For instance, a dom can use it to make their sub feel like they’re being whipped without actually touching them. They can even restrain their sub with just a single word once they’re out of the trance. Or if their sub has a size fetish they can make them feel tiny or gigantic while they’re in the trance.
There’s a risk that these triggers could be used for exploitation though, which is why it’s important to talk through boundaries before trying this with someone. You can also set up post-hypnotic commands that only trigger at certain times. For example, you can hypnotise your sub so that she can only have orgasms when a specific trigger is used.
Having this conversation is important, especially when you’re using a hypnotist who’s not someone you know personally. If they suggest things that violate your moral code, kick them out right away.
Getting Involved
Whether you’re a hypnotist or a participant in an erotic hypnosis scene, it’s important to talk through boundaries before the session begins. The hypnotist should know your limits, triggers, and goals for the session in order to provide an appropriate experience.
Hypnosis can help you drop your inhibitions and become more open to pleasure, but it doesn’t let you do things against your morals or who you are as a person. For example, if you’re an animal lover and your hypnotist tells you to run over a rabbit, you would snap out of it.
If you’re interested in erotic hypnosis, it might be helpful to find a hypnotist that specializes in that area of kink, Riley says. Many hypnotists have their voice sample and specialties listed on their website, or you can ask friends for recommendations on a local hypnotist. Fetlife and other kink websites are also good places to start looking.
Once a scene is done, the hypnotist will bring their partner out of hypnosis. Then, they may talk through a safe word to use in case one of them becomes overwhelmed by the sensations. They’ll also talk through what they want to accomplish in the scene. For example, a top might want to teach the bottom to orgasm on command, while the sub might want to feel pleasure and please the top.